- Buy a cowboy hat: black if you want to look ‘bad’, white for the ‘safe guy’ look. Ladies: if you choose a hat, lots of rhinestones please.
- Get a plaid, form-fitting longsleeve shirt for that rugged look. Wear with the first few buttons open. Something tight & cowboy like for the women with lots of fringe & satin embroidery.
- Press those tight boot-cut blue jeans. Women may also where spandex pants.
- Polish your cowboy boots. If you’re female & choose the spandex pants, opt for shoes with spiked heels & straps.
- Ladies, be sure to get the BIG hairdo. Gentleman should be well trimmed, a bit longer on top than the sides.Facial hair optional, but always well oiled & trimmed.
- Choose a ‘real American’ setting, like a trailer park, a bar, or a truck stop.
- Really emote while you sing, particularly during the sad, lonesome, depressed parts of the song.
- Make sure there are a few shots of your pick-up truck.
- Guys: either go for the slightly vulnerable but still manly posturing, or the keep women in their place manly posturing.
- Gals: stand by your man, unless, of course, he’s a real dog, then you can kill him.
- Throw in a shot or two of the wailing guitar.
- Finish off with somebody driving off into the sunset in the pick-up truck.
- For a bit of excitement, add some Confederate flags.
- Men, don’t forget to pump some iron so you keep that construction worker look. Ladies, if they’re not at least a D cup, get some inserts.
- If you don’t have your own pick-up truck, talk your local car dealer into giving you one for the free publicity.